Troublesome. :(

I just feel like typing something here. But my mind is blank. Hmm.

I don't know what is currently troubling my heart now. Is it about the interview? The applications? Whether I can get scholarship or not? Which uni would accept my application? Or what if none of the uni that I applied would accept me and rejected me coz my diploma results were not good enough? What if I could get accepted in one of the uni, but I couldn't cope up with the syllabus, the teaching method, the environment? What if I couldn't survive being so far away from home, from the familiarity of my hometown? What if..

Too many what ifs. Too many doubts. Its very nerve wrecking.

Now I finally understand what my friends had faced before. What they felt. How they were so damn worried about their studies, their future, and all the endless what ifs. Just like me now.

What if I couldn't achieve what I dreamed of all these years, and failed to make my family proud?

That's what I feared the most. :(

Hope I can be tough. I NEED to be tough. Be strong mentally and physically.

But still. I keep having this awful thinking that all the uni that I applied would reject me. Seriously, I'm effin scared!

'Ya Allah.. I need your guidance.. Please help me to calm myself.. And face the world and reality as strong as I could.. Amin'