murtad and beautiful Islam..

Isu murtad actually scares me.

Kan memang dah lama isu murtad tgh hangat diperkatakan kat Malaysia. But I'm surprised that it is still on-going. Two nights ago while I was studying for my test for the next day, I decided to take a break and logged on to Facebook. There in news feed, someone posted a YouTube video about "jawapan balas kepada Benjamin Stephen" or lebih kurang macam tu la. Persoalannya, siapa Benjamin Stephen? Itu yang aku lebih interested in. So aku tryla cari dekat YouTube..

Rupa-rupanya Benjamin Stephen tu seorang paderi yang bagi ceramah/berdakwah di salah sebuah gereja di Kuching. Dia bersunggguh-sungguh menyampaikan dakwah about Christian being a much better religion than Islam. He talked bad about Al-Quran and the Arabic language used in it, and about Prophet Muhammad SAW. How dare he said that our beloved and much respected Prophet just pandai "cakap serupa bikin"? Kurang ajar.

Anyway, the reason for the preaching was to openly inviting Malays to convert into Christianity, that's why bersungguh-sungguh memburukkan Islam supaya mengaburi minda orang Islam yang iman tengah goyah-goyah sikit disebabkan konflik hidup diorang sendiri. And the thing that amazed me was when Benjamin Stephen recited a piece of recitation from Al-Quran (which I forgot the name of the recitation) which meant 'perhiasan'/'decoration. Memang perfect gila dengan tajwid dan idgham sekali masa dia baca ayat Al-Quran tu. So it made me think, is he also a Christian-converted Malay? Itu saya tidak tauuu..

It made me wonder; why would anyone possibly considering of throwing away Islam and converted into other religions? I also came across a video in YouTube about Hasnah, who was once a Muslim (but an unpracticed one) and converted into Christianity when she was studying in the States. She said she grew up in a household whom father was a gambler and mother was an alcoholic. So she wasn't being taught of Islamic teachings since she was little. She studied hard at school because she wanted to go away from the terrible household and managed to get a scholarship to study in a uni in the States. From there, she started to befriend someone who was the President of the Christian Association or something, so day by day she was influenced by the friend and she later converted into Christianity and was really happy for it.

Iman yang goyah boleh membuatkan terkeluar dari agama Islam dan mengikuti agama lain. Something that I never thought would happen since I was little, yang taboo for me. Memang tak boleh terima je kalau Melayu bukan Islam. Macam di Indonesia tu lain lah kan. Kalau di Malaysia ni, memang peliklah. Tapi itulah hakikatnya, semakin hari semakin banyak yang murtad. Nauzubillah.

And it made me realized that I have not been a good Muslim so far in my life. I wasted a lot of my time on stupid stuffs, benda-benda yang tak ada benifit, yang tak mendatangkan kebaikan, yang memudaratkan. I made a whole lot of mistakes in the past that I hope can be forgiven by Allah SWT. I admit that I am ashamed of my past, and constantly wishing that it would be different after all, and wishing that I could be a better person while growing up and become the person that I am today. But no, as much as I wanted it to, I can't rewrite the history of my life, nor can I take back what I did.

I believe that it is not too late to learn and practice to be nearer to the Creator and to strengthen our faith to our religion and make it part of our lives. I pray that I can be a better Muslim, and when the time comes for me to leave this world, may I be prepared for it. Amin. :)